


Tsugi no Yume (Next Dream)

by vogue91



Category: Hey! Say! JUMP, Johnny's Entertainment
Genre: Angst, Car Accidents, Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Murder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-04-29
Packaged: 2019-04-29 13:26:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14473704
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vogue91/pseuds/vogue91
Summary: Daiki couldn’t remember much.He remembered the scream. The deafening sound.The darkness.When he had opened his eyes again, he remembered that the first thing he had seen had been Kei’s face, and that he had never looked more beautiful.





	Tsugi no Yume (Next Dream)

Daiki couldn’t remember much.

He remembered the scream. The deafening sound.

The darkness.

When he had opened his eyes again, he remembered that the first thing he had seen had been Kei’s face, and that he had never looked more beautiful.

“Where?” he had been about to ask then, mumbling a little, before realizing he was in a hospital room.

And so he had kept quiet and had started thinking again about what had happened.

They were in the car, weren’t they?

Ryo had gotten his license a while ago and...

Daiki had frowned as his mind had come up with something, but he had discarded it because he hadn’t wanted to believe it.

Then he had said he was thirsty, and after drinking he had looked around.

He couldn’t say who was there and who wasn’t, it didn’t matter.

Inoo, sitting close to his bed, kept holding his hand and smiling to him, telling him that it was going to be okay.

 

_“Oh come on, Dai-chan! They must have given a driver license for something, right?”_

_“Fine, let’s go. But I’m telling you, at the first mistake you pull over and I drive.”_

Daiki had never trusted Ryosuke much, or at least he had always pretended he didn’t.

A few hours from the time he had woken up he still hadn’t asked any questions, nor the others had insisted on giving him informations.

Once alone, he had started thinking back to that day.

He had had a good time, as much he recalled.

They had been to Disneyland and had had dinner together, and he had felt really good.

Then they had gotten inside the car to go back home and...

Daiki didn’t know whether it was his mind refusing to remember, or if the details had actually been erased.

But he knew, he was no fool.

The others hadn’t said and he hadn’t asked, because he was damn scared of what they would’ve said.

He didn’t want to hear them say that Ryo was gone.

 

~

 

_“Taste it, Daiki!”_

_“What is it?”_

_“Strawberry ice cream mochi.”_

_“Too sweet for my tastes.”_

_“Come on, just try it! It’d really make me happy.”_

_“I’m sure you’re going to survive it.”_

_“You’re really the worst boyfriend, you know that?”_

_“I’ll make up for it another time.”_

In the end, whether he had wanted it or not, the truth had come.

And it had hurt more than he could’ve imagined.

He had cried all his tears, screamed with all he had.

There was always someone ready to soothe him, but he didn’t need anyone to tell him it was going to be okay, he just needed to see Ryo, to be by his side, to hold his hand.

And the fact that he couldn’t drove him crazy.

Kei had been at his place for what it felt like a thousand times, until he had become a constant presence for Daiki.

He always pretended everything was okay, he never mentioned Yamada and tried to take care of him, as much as he could.

Arioka didn’t make it easy for him, because he didn’t really want to be taken care of, he didn’t want Kei to keep worrying about him.

He just wanted to be alone with his memories and his pain, shut himself away inside that home that had seen them happy and be there forever, never being forced to think about something that wasn’t Yamada again.

But then, as time went by, his own mid caught him off guard.

The memories faded, thoughts became rarer, and he was almost afraid of that weird process, because he didn’t want to forget, because it wasn’t fair.

He clung onto the pieces of those memories that were everything to him, and he wasn’t willing to let them go.

 

_“Ryo?”_

_“What?”_

_“Thank you. For today.”_

_“Thank you for trusting me enough to drive. You see, I’m good. Wasn’t lying.”_

_“You know what I mean. I’m happy when I’m with you. I love you.”_

_“I love you too, Daiki.”_

Time had hurt that love.

Had crystalized it, like a picture, motionless.

And Daiki couldn’t take those memories, all the same, and so he had torn down the barricades and slowly had started living again, hoping that getting distracted would’ve made Yamada’s images in his mind alive like they once were.

Kei had been glad about it.

Daiki remembered one night he had asked him to go grab a drink together, and how happy the elder had been. 

Since then he had decided to pay him back for all his attempts at making him feel better, and had made an effort for him and for all the others to look like the Arioka Daiki he had been before the accident.

He had done his best, and he was sure somehow he had managed that.

Inoo had started coming at his place more often.

Then one night, Daiki couldn’t say how, they had ended up in bed together.

He had tried not to cry, not to imagine Ryo there with him, because Kei didn’t deserve it.

When he had reached his orgasm he had bitten down on the elder’s shoulder, trying not to scream, because he didn’t know what name he would’ve called.

The other seemed to have noticed, but he hadn’t cared much about it.

It was likely, Daiki had thought, that he had taken that into account.

Then he had felt weird.

Weird for having been with someone who wasn’t Ryo, weird because he had liked it, weird because it had been different from what he was used to.

Weird, but not bad.

It had happened more and more often, until he had grown accustomed to it; to Kei’s presence, to his scent among his sheets, to his stuff around the house.

He had grown accustomed to thinking about him more than about Ryosuke, perhaps for a defence mechanism, or perhaps because he could really feel something for him.

He was still the boy who had torn him away from his emptiness, and Daiki was never going to cease being grateful to him for that.

He didn’t know if his guilt was ever going to disappear, and if he was ever going to be able to love him like he deserved.

 

_“Do you promise, Dai-chan?”_

_“I promise, Ryo. I will always love only you.”_

~

 

Kei hadn’t accounted for a lot of things.

He had thought that if Daiki would’ve died as well, it would’ve been the punishment he deserved.

He hadn’t thought the car would’ve endured this long, he hadn’t thought that Daiki would’ve survived, he hadn’t thought about what good Ryosuke’s death could’ve been for him.

But destiny, as it looked, had been his ally.

And now that Ryosuke had died by his hand, he would’ve kept being next to the man he loved. 


End file.
